The “Let Them” Rule of Dating
I see this all the time - brilliant, successful women who are overextending, second-guessing and holding onto connection that aren’t holding onto them.
You’re used to giving 100% to everything you do, so when someone pulls away or give you just enough to keep you interested, it’s easy to wonder:
“What am I doing wrong? What more can I give?”
➡️ But here’s what I need you to hear: Love isn’t something you earn. The right person will meet you there, willingly.
You don’t have to convince, do more, or shrink yourself to be chosen.
Instead of working harder to prove your worth, what if you simply… let them?
What it looks like in dating:
LET THEM take hours (or days) or reply.
People show you who they are - believe them. You don’t need to remind someone to be consistent. Instead of overanalyzing their actions, focus on someone who show up effortlessly.
LET THEM avoid defining the relationship.
You don’t have to manage someone into choosing you. If they aren’t sure, let them be unsure. Let them stay in their confusion while you walk towards clarity.
LET THEM disappear after an amazing date.
Not everyone is meant to stay. Let them ghost, let them pull away, let them exit your life without closure.
LET THEM make you feel like you’re “too much”.
You don’t have to shrink or be less to make someone comfortable.
LET THEM get defensive when you express your needs.
Let them shut down, let them deflect. Their reaction is not yours to fix. You don’t have to over-explain yourself to be understood. You don’t have to convince someone that your feelings are valid.
LET THEM come back only when it’s convenient for them.
And then… let them stay exactly where they left — in your past. You deserve someone who is consistent and chooses you even when it isn’t “convenient”.
Letting them isn’t about losing — it’s about choosing.
Choosing ease over struggle. Self-resect over chasing. Alignment over potential.
💌 An invitation 💌
This is a self-love journey first, and a love story second.
🌸 Overcome dating patterns that leave you feeling undervalued
🔒 Build self-trust so you stop questioning yourself and the partners you attract
🧲 Learn how to surrender into ease while still being intentional - so love flows to you rather than earning it and chasing it
Connect with me on Instagram (@meleah_manning) and send me a DM saying “RRA” to be added to the waitlist for Radiant Relationship Academy. We are getting close to opening the doors again very soon!
