Healthy Pacing in Dating
Falling hard and fast is cute & all.. until it’s the 5th time you’ve done it and now you’re complaining to your friends about how all men are the same. 😩🙄
Are men really all the same OR have you just yet to learn about healthy pacing in dating so your relationship patterns have been running the show and causing you to have the same experiences on repeat…? 🤔
YUP, let’s get into it.
Here is what you need to know to STOP rushing the connection and have a healthy pace in dating:
1️⃣ Discern between fantasy/potential and reality.
Look, we all do it — we meet someone we feel excited about and start daydreaming about what a cute life we’d have together. I’m not saying you can’t do that, I’m saying discern between that and what is actual reality.
What actions are they showing you? What are their character & qualities like — right now, currently?
2️⃣ Do not sleep with him until you’ve built a solid, trusting foundation together.
This can look different for different people — but the big thing here is if you don’t trust him with your heart, WHY are you sleeping with him?
Sleeping together is the fast track to getting attached. You need to make sure he has actually earned your trust and that privilege to have the closest, deepest access possible to you first.
Are you on the same page about your connection and where it’s headed and are communicating openly — great, green light to get intimate. 🚦
3️⃣ Focus on whether you are compatible and if you actually like him, rather than if he likes you.
Do your values and vision for the future align?
This is the mindset: “I am enjoying this, I like him, AND I need to continue getting to know him to know if we are compatible.”
4️⃣ Do not change your routine, your personality or your priorities for him.
It’s normal to potentially move a couple things around when you start dating someone seriously — but if you stop seeing your friends, fall out of your own routine, or your own boundaries or personality changes, red flag. 🚩
5️⃣ Learn how to validate yourself.
Otherwise, you will always be searching for external validation for a partner and choose the wrong men. You must have the skill of self-validate on LOCK, sis. (hot tip: it actually makes you more radiant!)
Now for the hard part — apply it! ✅
If you don’t really need more “how-to’s” and knowledge and what you actually need is a coach and a process to hold you accountable in finally attracting an emotionally available, fulfilling relationship where your patterns don’t sabotage it —
Go ahead and get on the waitlist for Radiant Relationship Academy.
